Shyness, lack of insurance, impostor syndrome, I am not enough this or that …. These words seem familiar to you? It’s that you’re on the right article!
We know that the quest for self-confidence can be fraught with difficulties, but today you are no longer alone in this quest. Here are our best tips so that you can finally occupy the place you deserve.
Identify the origin of your lack of confidence
To begin, it is important to identify where your lack of trust comes from (your physical, your environment, your past, a fear …).
Then, do you care about the question of temporality, since when does it prevent you from being the one you deserve?
Finally, let’s end with the thorny question of its frequency: it only appears in certain occasions is it becoming recurrent in your life?
Take the time to do this little work of introspection (where, when, frequency), it will allow you to highlight the cause of your lack of confidence and find the appropriate solutions.
Write down all your thoughts about the problem on a sheet of paper, do not restrict yourself. Lack of trust is certainly not the business of a single cause. Do not hesitate to question your entourage, who can bring you answers that you would not have thought.
By highlighting the concerns, you will probably see ideas that go in the same direction, ideas that show how you devalue. This is where your blockages, limiting beliefs, find that by rationalizing you disarticulate to take a step back and no longer feel the heart of the turmoil of lack of self-confidence.
Example: You are not pretty enough / smart / … since your half sister told you when you were a kid that you would never be so beautiful / smart / … that she. As an adult, you know that these words of a child can be hurtful but should not prejudge the charming woman you are today.
Stop comparing yourself to others
One of the greatest scourges of the 21st century is undoubtedly the problem of comparing oneself to others. A problem maintained by social networks with the silhouette of women / men with the perfect body, the perfect life, the exceptional careers …
RELATIVIZE! Be aware that those people you follow, whom you admire only show you the good moments of their lives, no one shares the negative aspects. Moreover, we do not know anything about the “real” life of these people and even if they give the illusion of being happy and having confidence in them, the reality can sometimes be quite different. Social networks embellish reality, make no mistake.
First, see these successful people as engines, if they found success why not you? Second, no life is perfect. If you research about these people you will easily discover their galleys to get started, their complexes, their heartaches or their health concerns. Of course, this is not what they want, it is just the vagaries of life that are present in the destiny of absolutely everyone.
Conversely, you can use social networks to increase your self-confidence! We fight evil with evil. We can not count the testimonials of Youtubeuses, Instagrameuses who evoke the fact that when they launched themselves on the networks, they did not have confidence in them and that these networks had precisely a therapeutic effect! We must not seek the approval of others and want to be beautiful in the eyes of others. You must find yourself beautiful in your eyes!
Have you ever noticed that when a person trusts her, she shines? That’s the key.
Become your best friend
The eyes of others raise another important issue: we are too hard on ourselves. Our bad habit is to be less tolerant with ourselves than with others. Now think about the behaviors you may have had lately towards you, the things you could have told yourself in the midst of a crisis of lack of trust …. Would you have said the same to someone you love, whom you feel ? Certainly not.
To have confidence in yourself, you have to love yourself. From now on, treat yourself as someone you cherish and stop flogging yourself mentally. Whenever you are in a complicated phase or after a hard blow, ask yourself the following question: What should I say to my best friend?
Of course, this will not be done in a few days. But little by little, you will integrate this mechanism and abandon your negativity. And at that moment, you will be able to reap the full benefits of your work.
Cultivate your self-confidence
As Voltaire said, “We must cultivate our garden”. But not only ! You must also cultivate your self-confidence. For this, it is strongly recommended to practice sports activities. Indeed, these will allow you to go beyond, out of your comfort zone and maintain your health. In a few moments you will be proud of what you / your body can accomplish.
Then pay attention to your surroundings. Our entourage has a great influence on our state of mind and actions. Surround yourself with the right people, those who inspire, motivate you, push you to action, compliment you. On the other hand, identify the toxic people who are used to lamenting their fate and who are negative. You need to set up small daily actions that will allow you to reconcile with yourself and enjoy life to its true value.
Last tip: remember to sleep well, fatigue is always bad counselor for your confidence in you.
And you Fuzzy, what are your tips to boost your self-confidence?
Feel free to share your experiences in comments!